Self-Friendzoning

I’m starting to believe that my mate is somewhere getting his teeth kicked in at this very moment and when he makes his way over, I’ll be long gone. Do you ever feel this way?

So I recently posted a blog titled Assumption Makes an Ass, where I sent a text to all my male and female friends inquiring on what were their top three qualities they look for in a partner. Everyone gave really good answers and it helped shine light on the point that I was trying to prove: we all share similar interests when seeking our most compatible mate so assuming you’re off someone’s list isn’t always the best unless they blatantly come out and tell you 😬

Derrick Rose

Yes, of course the guy I imagine is for me would be at least 6ft y’all with smooth chocolate skin. His would have a clean shaved bald head with a full goatee and a smile full of beautiful white teeth. His mind will be full of consciousness and when we speak, I will be in awe wondering where had he been my whole life. The deep topics would send us both through time as the days and nights pass us by due to the amount of entertainment we would share.

Now I will stop there because I don’t want any guys who have the misconception that all women want a chiseled football players with six figures, a long Johnson and no kids. There’s more than just looks to a guy that is women look for and you know what? We all don’t have to date that one guy who PLACED HIMSELF into the friendzone. Just as men have a certain woman that imagine themselves being with, so do women and that’s perfectly fine. It’s called having preferences. Take a look at The Root’s article titled “There’s Nothing Wrong With Having Dating Preferences.” The author Monique Judge states,

A lot of problems occur when people “settle” for less than what they want in a relationship. Although it can be all good in the beginning, eventually problems surface because being unevenly yoked with your partner is not ideal. Those differences can make you become resentful and lead to unhealthy behaviors in the relationship.

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.theroot.com/there-s-nothing-wrong-with-having-dating-preferences-1825303985/amp

I agree with her completely. When you get with someone who isn’t on the same page as you’d like, it adds a strain or burden unless it is something you are able to motivate them to advance through. A lot of relationships come with compromising and support. If your partner isn’t happy with what they have going on, then try to develop a plan together that will help them get to where they feel they need to be. I’ve learned a lot when it comes to men not being where they’re satisfied in life. Sometimes it can be really challenging to expect a lot of growth within a relationship itself because they’re not really focusing on that but rather how to get out of this rut.

Here’s a thought? Maybe I should try attending a speed dating event? I’ll discuss this more within another post. For now, you lovelies stay magnificent and work on communicating more with those you care about!

Be sure to follow my blog, sign up for my emailing list with giveaways and follow me on IG: @_simpleebree_

💋Sabrina


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